Andrew Galarza

Can There be Grief Without Suffering?

Pain is Inevitable. Suffering is not.

Vanessa Bennett
7 min readJun 2, 2019

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I have a tendency of thinking about things in a very logical way, somewhat detached, rolling it around in my mind examining it from every angle. Recently, however, grief has shown up in such a present and personal way that it has challenged my seeming ability to keep a distance and compartmentalize feelings, and has caused me to feel into it in ways I haven’t yet experienced.

In the last couple of months, multiple clients have found their way to me who are struggling with huge losses in their lives. In therapy, we have a saying that the clients we need, find us. As I was in the midst of considering why grieving clients have been surfacing, my godmother passed away after a lifelong battle with type 1 diabetes, and then shortly after, my boyfriend’s father passed. I began realizing while looking it square in the face, that I was unsure of my relationship to grief, in myself, and also in how I sit with clients, family, and friends experiencing it.

I am good at working with clients in life transition. Clients considering a career change. Clients struggling with anxiety. Clients with poor boundaries and unhealthy coping skills. Clients grappling with low self-esteem and attachment issues. My background as a clinician and deep personal experience and study of mindfulness…

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Vanessa Bennett

Psychotherapist, Mindfulness + Codependency Coach. Cohost of the Cheaper Than Therapy Podcast. IG:vanessasbennett